remember you used to say i was incredible
and i believe it
i am incredible..
we are.. ‘
oh my what an appetite
for a small thing like me / big on the inside
i let my heart introduce me.
id rather not be so absent minded
how long have i been here?
close your eyes and ask it
i am ..
I am …
something before memory itself
for someone .. with such gifts.. you have a wandering imagination..
maybe i should look back at God in the mirror
look back on the audience member
in the seat of the treatre
in front of the projector..
that is the mind in a dream
i was never sure if i had created it or if it had been created for me
am i the author? of my dream //
i am the author in my drea,m,,, and yet, still i
like to forget i am that
i like to watch the show play out as scripted..
i am an allower of Nature’s way ..
i am an allower of the creators thoughts. plays. .
i know i have a part to play
i can say my lines
i can live my truth
harder this time .!
i am a player, only this time i am looking directly at my creator, my director , at the projection room behind the audience, behind the camera, facing me . and looking at me too, spot on.
i am the player , only this time i know i am no one
im not playing / acting, to be someone
unless that someone is God himself my creator
my director, .. my self
still simultaneously , my self
i direct myself in higher consciousness
i use consciousness to seek before-consciousness
WHICH I AM
before this life, in between all lifetimes, seemingly,, but containing them all.
thats what we call Brahman and Parabrahman
sanskrit is just a (good) clue into understanding the nature of reality
like the Father, Son, Holy Spirit trinity
the son is the father and the father is the son, and the ghost
but they carry out different balanced parts of a whole
Like the Self which incarnates, and
falls in love!
that only appears
i am capable of so much more when i pray.
when i stare into the eyes of my creator, willing only to share eyes .. communicate .. bridge .. share minds ,
share a holy perspective
the I am
before identification with the gunas, the elements etc
what came before prakriti?
i know brahman does know itself even when it appears absent
i know we all know of our true divinity
and our connection to God through this apparent planet Earth.
I know Christ is coming , and here
i know how my higher self feels
and how she thinks
like NO MIND
the vital breath
i was pure somatic awareness, not even theorizing ,
allowing the play to roll maybe
(and knowing the directors here)?
like a lovely lucid dream
when you felt more fantastic than ever before
because you remembered something true
about the elements that comprise your soul
and the stars you have been to , and can go again…
you were in a house .. that you were so happy to explore. and the expansive land it sat on. and the wise intelligent and emotionally magnetic company
probably only one more..
in your lucid dream, and you could find, anything to satisfy
you urge to simply see and be introduced to
worlds beyond .. previously unfathomed
climbing over fantastical ruins
with more dimensions and space
and less time
a dream and yet a place too
of course, it exists too. i traveled there beyond my body
i went there astrally but still i lived it and it was real
and the people i met there were real. and the town was real. and even though it was made of stuff that would totally vanish, we made that place real .
it was made of the stuff of our minds
it was programmable ‘matter’
it is.. a script im currently writing
“Whatever I want, isn’t it neat?”
youre not gonna know youre the author of your life/dream, and that’s alright.
its like how we love to fall asleep at night
its a relief to let go of a dead puppet
not the body full of light,
the idea of yourself.
let go of the idea
and be free to be it
Im not afraid to enter into new relationships, unlike some other people
i suspect its due mostly to the need for activity . the gunas all 3
thinking, doing, identifying
im so thirsty for a boo. just because i like having fun
not because i need it? i wont deny that i need it. thats ok. but im also okay without it.
somehow it feels like i always have it, even when it seeming isnt here
how much of her love (shakti) do i have for mySELF
now that i am alone?
how i celebrate! my bounty.
giving it away to no one
without a relationship at all
to prepare me for it
the primary one (Relationship)
self loving self is more than just words
the eye of Truth.